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These are the holidays from yesterday, Monday, July 11th. We unfortunately lost power in our house at noon yesterday and it still has not been restored. Bummer. I was supposed to be working from home today, but that didn’t pan out considering the no power and no internet situation. I took the day off instead and now I’m sitting in my parent’s nice air conditioned home….ahhhhh…..

This actually worked out perfectly because today is my first day with no official holidays. It is a little bit of a personal holiday for me though, July 12th marks my 7 year anniversary at my current employer. I suppose I deserved the day off to celebrate!



Today is a day to remember Thomas Bowdler whose claim to fame was ‘sanitizing’ the complete works of Shakespeare. He was born on this day in 1754 in an age where reading aloud from the Bible was a common form of family entertainment. His father alternated reading the Bible with Shakespeare to mix things up a bit…..thrilling, huh? Thomas came to realize when he was older that his father was omitting certain parts of the writings in order to make them more appropriate for women and children. Well, I read a lot of Shakespeare in high school and didn’t really seem to think it was too risqué or anything like that. I suppose I have to take into consideration that was over 200 years after all this bowdlerizing business went down. Yes, the word bowdlerizing was adapted from this dude’s life’s work. The exact definition is: to expurgate (a written work) by removing or modifying passages considered vulgar or objectionable. Hmmm…..sounds like a pretty stimulating life he led. I wonder what he would think of modern culture today, he is probably rolling over in his grave as we speak. I was curious as to what sort of things he deemed unacceptable in Shakespeare. Here are a few examples I found on Wikipedia:

  • In Hamlet, the death of Ophelia was referred to as an accidental drowning, omitting the suggestions that she may have intended suicide.
  • In Macbeth, Lady Macbeth’s famous cry “Out, damned spot!” was changed to “Out, crimson spot!”.
  • “God!” as an exclamation is replace with “Heavens!”

 To celebrate today’s holiday, I did not utter a curse word. Let me rephrase that, I TRIED not to utter any curse words. I have a pretty dirty mouth these days, I’m going to have to work on that soon now that I have an impressionable little youngster soaking in every syllable. I did reasonably well with today’s task, I didn’t actually say any naughty words out loud to anyone. There were several times when I cursed to myself though (hey, I work a desk job…it comes with the territory). Each time I said, uttered under my breath, or thought a curse word I would snap my hair tie on my wrist. Learning by corporal punishment, is there any better way? Now, if only I can find a way to get Rich to stop swearing….you think those dog shock collars could work in this capacity? It’s worth looking into. Here I am zipping my lips:

Total Cost to Celebrate: $0, only physical pain, no financial strain.



Oyez Oyez, it’s International Town Criers Day today! Oh man, if I could lead off every sentence with Oyez Oyez and it was socially acceptable, I really think I’d do it. Everyone knows who town criers were. They were basically the main form of information and news relaying back in the day. This is before newspapers and phones and all the evil social networking sites. We are now in the ‘oversharing information age’. Everyone knows everyone’s business at all times. I know I fit into this category, heck I’m writing a freaking blog right now (see? no swearing!). I decided to turn to today’s version of town crying to communicate some pertinent bulletins – Facebook and Smart Phones. It turns out I am not a good town crier because I screw up simple facts. Like today, as some of you may have seen, I announced on Facebook that today was free Slurpee day. I messed up the date though, I said it was the 7th rather than the 11th (7-11, you can see my confusion, right?). Surely I would have been hanged for a blunder like that. No second chances when it comes to town crying, that job is serious! I also called Rich and proclaimed that there was a severe thunderstorm warning in effect. He called me ‘weird’. Obviously I don’t have the town crier gene. I tried one final time to announce to my family old school style, verbally on a pedestal, the news of the Dege Family. Their reaction? They laughed in my face. The art of town crying is dead. Here is a picture of me making my announcement to the fam with my mom’s sweet cow bell:

Total Cost to Celebrate: $0


Clip of the Day:

To my surprise and delight, Funny or Die actually has an entire internet show dedicated to town criers. Here is one of the clips:


P.S. – Just let me know if you want me to make any special announcements for you, I have no problem using my thunderous voice in any situation.